"A brother offered to help me get a bid if I hooked up with him."
"I chatted with a senior in TriDelt about vacation getaway spots. It was fifteen minutes of island name dropping."
"I once spent the entire time talking to a girl who only knew the word 'yes.' She didn't know any other English phrase."
“One told me she had a pet iguana and that she hated her roommate because she wanted the lights off by 8:30pm every night for her iguana but her roommate in Hill wouldn't let her turn the lights off.”
“I was talking to a girl during rush who asked about my broken arm. Turns out her brother fell on me and broke it. Expect the medical bills.”
“A rush didn’t recognize me at first because I ‘looked so different with less make up on.’ Subtle.”
"I spoke to a guy who was convinced that every virus ever had been made by the government, dating back to the bubonic plague. I asked him if they even had labs then, and he assured me they did."