Fling is upon us!
If you haven’t already shattered your phone or fallen down a flight of stairs at Rumor, congratulations! Now all that’s left is to push through this marathon of a weekend and hope your poor, abused liver makes it out okay on the other side. As seasoned fling veterans, Street attempted to try out some tech to help the rest of your body survive the weekend. What did we find? Don’t rely on technology that will ultimately fail you—stick to the tried and true methods.
Convince all your friends to download/enable the Find My Friends App. Created by Apple back in ‘nam (aka around 2013), this old feature is a fail–proof way to figure out if your friends made it to Chance or if they’re napping from the earlier darty. It’s not creepy if it helps.
Download Drunk Mode and expect it to save you from embarrassment.
The app Drunk Mode is designed to help you “get crazy, stay safe,” however, we would argue it does neither. Designed to fix most of the problems that one faces during fling such as texting your ex, drunk dialing your mom, or blacking out and forgetting where you were the night before, it doesn’t really live up to the hype.
The app allows you to program in “drunk dial blocks.” This feature will remove the person in question from your address book. If you’re anything like us, this absolutely will not stop you from texting your ex–hookup, since their number/texts are still in your phone, just without a name.
The only cool part about the app is the “breadcrumbs” feature. Your late night trek to Allegro Pizza will not be forgotten, as you can set the parameters the next morning to show you where you walked between certain hours of the night.
Buy a heavy duty phone case if you don’t already have one.
The Ballistic ($59.99) can survive a drop from 12 feet on concrete, so it can probably make it to the Pool Party and back safely, depending on your thoughts on elevated surfaces.
Expect your battery to last all day.
Write your address/safe friend’s number on your body—it has saved us many a drinking holiday. Or, you’ll be stuck with your hookup's address tramp–stamp style for days post fling. Although they are made for children, we can all admit the practicality of these tattoos—pop one on and write that cutie you've been crushing on's number in the space provided. Trust us, they will love the phone call from the quad drunk tank.
Hopefully these things help you out, whether its your first fling or your last. Have fun, stay safe and stay away from roofs—you will fall and break a rib and ruin your fling #themoreyouknow.