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Arts & Entertainment

Alexander the gay

Oliver Stone's bloated new epic Alexander is really, really gay. Overt male homoeroticism pervades almost every other scene.

by JEFF LEVIN

Worse Than watching paint dry

Because we know more about film than all of Hollywood (and by the transitive property, that means all of you too), we thought we'd present to you, our glorious readers, the grandest film gaffes of the year 2004.

by ZACH SMITH

Stop in the name of law!

Closer features one of the most beautiful casts ever assembled. Alice (Natalie Portman) and Dan (Jude Law) face an obstacle in their relationship when Anna (Julia Roberts) is hired to take Dan's picture for a book cover jacket and a passionate kiss between the two ensues.

by HILLARY KELLY

Best of '04

Kanye West -- College Dropout The man behind some of Jay-Z's best work makes his debut, without a college degree to boot. Brian Wilson -- SMiLE 37 years after its inception, Brian Wilson re-records his "teenage symphony to God," who was pleased, but wanted more cowbell.

by 34TH STREET

Jerry Bruckheimer is a Garish Assclown

Within the first 10 minutes of National Treasure, a gunpowder-packed treasure ship, submerged under the icy tundra, explodes.

by CARLY DAUCHER

Go Hasselhoff, Go

The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie tries to be broad enough to appeal to a wide variety of audiences, but ultimately fails to please any.

by MATT KURUC

Editor's picks

Jim Newell Puff Daddy and the Family No Way Out Buying '97s No Way Out marked an important step in my record collection's evolution.

by 34TH STREET

Battle of the online rentals

In the age of campusfood, eBay and amazon.com, leaving the house has become a thing of the past. Now we can sit at home on the couch, wallowing in our own lethargy as the world's bounty is delivered right to our door.

by CLAYTON NEUMAN

Behind the Mask

Picture this: MC So-and-so doing 90 in a sky-blue, drop-top BMW, coasting along the Van Wyck, as the leaves falling from the trees coat the concrete with the carnival colors of autumn.

by JOHN COYNE

I want to defy

Before Dr. Alfred Kinsey's 1948 book Sexual Behavior in the Human Male exploded onto the bestseller list, Americans believed all sorts of crazy things about sex: that masturbation causes blindness, dancing spreads venereal disease and wearing high heels can make a woman sterile.

by JEFF LEVIN

Renee is fat again...

Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason delivers what you would expect in a sequel to the 2001 hit. Our story resumes eight weeks into Bridget (Renee Zellweger) and Mark Darcy's (Colin Firth) relationship.

by ALIX MCKENNA

We're on Merge Records

Win Butler had no idea how much the last couple of years would change his life. For him, the 2000's have been microcosmic of a lifetime's worth of ups and downs.

by JIM NEWELL

Imagine Johnny Depp's sword

Humor is blended with gravity, and fantasy with reality, in the enjoyable Finding Neverland. Set in 1903 London, the film chronicles the true story of J.

by JENNIFER ZUCKERMAN

Editor's Picks

John Coyne Vast Aire "The F-Word" (RJD2 Remix) Rap records rarely endure; they just float from fabulous to familiar to forgotten.

by 34TH STREET

A-Hem!

If you're like most Penn students -- make that people in general -- you have no clue who Hem is. The band, however, believes that their debut album, Rabbit Songs, and most recent effort, Eveningland, have what it takes to garner some recognition.

by ALEXIS NANOVIC

Hallelujah!

Enduring Love Starring: Daniel Craig and Samantha Morton Directed by: Roger Michell Rated: R "You're mad." "That's what they said about Jesus." "Yea, that's also what they said about a lot of mad people." Enduring Love, a psychological thriller, is the eeriest movie of the year.

by ALEXIS ORENSTEIN

Editor's Picks

Jim Newell Mirah C'mon Miracle If you're a male and have yet to hear a song by Mirah, it might be best to avoid her.

by 34TH STREET

Music from the ground up

Built for music from the ground up. That's not the new tagline for the U2-edition iPod, the new Bose stereo or the Electric Factory.

by WILL FENTON

Alfie who?

Alfie Starring: Jude Law, Susan Sarandon, Marisa Tomei Directed by: Charles Shyer Rated: R Sometimes the main character in a film is bigger than the film itself.

by ROB COHEN

Real superheroes don't wear capes

The Incredibles Starring: Craig T. Nelson, Holly Hunter, Jason Lee Directed: Brad Bird Rated: PG Meet Bob Parr: He's married, he has three kids, he's fat.

by CLAYTON NEUMAN

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