Campus Life

Under the Button Editor: I was having a really good convo with this guy on Tinder until he called me a sexy Jewess.
February 6, 2014 at 8:00 am

This Phi Psi/Sphinx dreamboat will lead you through the wilderness with PennQuest or serenade you with The Shabbatones—but most importantly, this former One in Four president will always treat the ladies right, because consent is sexy.
February 6, 2014 at 8:00 am

Tweeting in the cold is hard to do
February 4, 2014 at 10:49 am

You cut for the first time this semester! Here's why
January 31, 2014 at 8:00 am

Fresh from a holiday in Palm Springs, Penn’s very own sex guru has returned to answer your questions. Mama’s back, children.
January 30, 2014 at 9:47 am

Ego recommends this yummy dish!
January 30, 2014 at 9:32 am

Name: Theresa Picciallo Year: 2016 Major: Cinema Studies, Minor: Consumer Psych
January 30, 2014 at 9:30 am

“Are you a freshman?” I slurred through a vodka cranberry haze as I flirted with the first hot guy I met during NSO this semester.
January 30, 2014 at 9:20 am

Vegetarian JAP: Don’t tell anyone, but I had chicken last night. And I wasn’t drunk.
January 30, 2014 at 9:14 am

I said BRRR. It’s cold in here. There must be some gossip in the atmosphere. The temperature may be dropping, but Highbrow is just heating up.
January 30, 2014 at 9:04 am

Bobby Blue, medium rare, crunchified, sweet potato fries and fry sauce on the side, thanks. My name is Chloe Bower and I’m a burger addict. More specifically, I’m a Bobby’s Burger Palace addict.
January 30, 2014 at 9:02 am

Hover over the red dots to find more info on where you should be taking your potty breaks
January 30, 2014 at 8:47 am

Emilie “spelled in a weird way because my family is from France” Abrams is the go–to girl for Urban Nutrition Initiative (UNI), studying PoliSci and East Asian Studies. She’s been around the world and back a few too many times—she just can’t keep her accents straight.
January 30, 2014 at 8:15 am

Do you wanna be on top?
January 28, 2014 at 8:58 am

Our favorite moments of the beginning of spring seMEHster
January 23, 2014 at 10:06 am

Name: Elee O’Neill Year: 2014 Major: Nursing Tattoos: She has three, all done in Philadelphia parlors
January 23, 2014 at 10:00 am

Penn publication editor: Who wrote this, an immigrant?
January 23, 2014 at 9:14 am

On Wednesday of last week I was only registered for two classes. Not too dramatic, I know, but for me, under-enrollment was traumatizing.  Advanced Registration had never failed me in the past.
January 23, 2014 at 9:08 am

The Fun of a Furry Friend, Without the Responsibility!
January 23, 2014 at 9:00 am

Eat something for lunch other than a bagel from Mark’s/ No more sex in cabs/ Finally get with the boys on the Radian 14th floor/ Tell my thesis advisor what I really think of her/ Have sex in the bathroom of all four campus bars/ Stop farting in public/ Understand foreskin/ Stop hooking up with guys I can’t stand/ Stop pretending not to know people on Locust/ Be less bitchy to my mother/ Stop apologizing so much/ Use one weight machine at Pottruck without embarrassing and injuring myself (or others)/ Actually remember all the fun I have when I wake up the next morning/ Skinny dip in the Schuylkill/ Learn how to walk in heels/ Do something for someone else every day/ Know what is going on in the world beyond Penn/ Go to an Elmo naked party...naked this time/ Start working out during the mornings/ Stop walking from Starbucks to Van Pelt to Williams back to Starbucks looking for a place to study/ Stop walking around aimlessly in general/ Stop trying to run into that single person on Locust/ Cook more meals at home/ TEAR DOWN THE PATRIARCHY/Make THEOS irrelevant/ Ensure that the Wizard of Farts graduates so his power never sees Locust Walk again/ Stop only dating Jewish boys/ Stop hooking up with boys in the same lineage/ Stop reading CollegiateACB/ Get fucked in the ass more (or is that not highbrow enough?)/ Be fucking happy/ Have sex with a TA/ Learn that pizza isn’t a reliable friend/ Find someone to treat my tender boy pussy the right way/ Stop saying “You too” to the woman at Commons who tells me to have a good dinner/ Get gayer #nohetero/ Tell him my favorite part of the night is when he hugs me goodbye/ Get APES kicked off campus... oh wait/ Pee on Ben Franklin and not get arrested/ Take a full piss without hitting the rim or floor once/ NO MORE INSOMNIA COOKIES/ Wear my Greek letters more often/ Finally get with the boy I’ve liked since NSO freshman year/ Destroy more egos by not faking orgasms anymore/ Stop using people as social experiments/ Get head every time I give head/ Enjoy being able-bodied and young/ Read one book per week/ Eat more green things/ Don’t get ice cream after EVERY run/ Stop accidentally sending dick snapchats to my aunt/ Not pay for cheats on Candy Crush/ Cut down on my Tinder use/ Never set foot in Pike again/ Make out with a closeted frat guy at Smokes’/ Develop a consistent morning routine/ Have something that at least resembles a real relationship/ Smoke less pot and snort less cocaine/ Learn to not determine my self–worth in relation to other people/ Not accidentally make out with a 55-year-old again/ Give less fucks/ Floss.
January 23, 2014 at 8:45 am