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Highbrow

The Round Up: 04.03.2014

Highbrow’s starting a new senior society. You want in? Sorry, we’re not looking for Greek “leaders” or overhyped athletes.

by 34TH STREET

Tweet of the Week: 04.01.2014

Vote for the spring's best tweet!

by 34TH STREET

Ask LaLa: Getting Lube-erated

Unlike the orgasm you faked last night, I'm real.

by LALA

Word on the Street: An Hour of Our Own

Penn breeds Winners. Every hour of every day, we’re Achieving and becoming Leaders. And it never stops. 6–8 a.m., we’re competing for the title of “Woke Up Earliest to Do Homework.” 9–11 a.m., the game is on for “Has Too Much Class to Eat Breakfast.” 12–3 p.m., “Spent the Longest Amount of Time at Pottruck.” 4–6 p.m., “Too Much Volunteering to Eat Dinner.” 7–9 p.m., “Finished Lab Report Before Pregame.” 10–12 a.m., “Took Most Shots Without Blacking Out.” 1–3 a.m., “Stayed Out the Latest, No FOMO.” 4–6 a.m., “Slept the Least.” We just can’t stop competing, against our friends and ourselves.

by ANASTASIA LYALENKO

Raising a Brow

The new list of what's in and what's out.

by 34TH STREET

Overheard at Penn: 03.27.2014

Pikapp pledge: We need, like, some more wholesome Protestants. We have a fair amount of Catholics, but they’re basically Jews.

by 34TH STREET

The Round Up: 03.27.2014

Dear little Brownie Bites, did you have a nice weekend? Did you enjoy the sunshine while throwing back Guinness and Bailey’s?

by 34TH STREET

Tweet of the Week: 03.25.2014

[poll id="204"]

by 34TH STREET

Overheard at Penn: 3.20.2014

Theos boy: I’m kind of trendy right now.

by 34TH STREET

The Meh List: Spring Break Edition

1. Mall movie theaters 2. Early morning flights 3. Continental Breakfasts 4. Florida 5. PV FOMO 6.

by 34TH STREET

Ask LaLa

Introducing LaLa: Hi.

by LALA

Word on the Street: Our Better Half

We didn’t ask for this to be easy. We didn’t come to Penn looking for a relaxing four–year spring break.

by PATRICK FORD-MATZ

Texts From Last Night: Spring Break edition

(857): I watch more porn than I watch movies.   (714): God I would jam you so hard   (714): U know I’m hot as fuck   (714): I don’t jerk to ppl who think I’m ugly   (714): Dude ur totes buying condoms at the mall   (510): Spring breakers is actually pretty accurate cause I wanna kill like everyone in Miami right now   (510): Fuck I literally accidently texted my ex instead of you asking him “where he at in this gay club”   (646): I don’t think I’m alive anymore...I just puked 5 times before 1pm   (773): My burn finally turned to tan!! Just in time to peel off...it now looks likes splotty third nipple   (508): My strep rash cleared just in time to get sunburnt   (734): You’d think we’d get drunk and do something fun but we just got drunk and played monopoly   (215): Damn mtha fackacs   (516): She had a nipple piercing and a tramp stamp but told me not to worry because she got both when she 15.

by 34TH STREET

Highbrow Does Grindr

Week two of Highbrow's immersion into the complicated world of dating apps.

by 34TH STREET

The Roundup: 3.20.2014

Welcome back to Penn–adise, muchachos. Sorry you have to trade your bikinis for winter parkas. While the weather may be cold and cloudy, Highbrow is here to bring the sunshine back into your lives.

by 34TH STREET

Tweet of the Week: 03.18.2014

[poll id="203"]

by 34TH STREET

Tweet of the Week: 03.05.2014

Spring break will totally come faster if you vote for a tweet

by 34TH STREET

Word on the Street: Sharing Semen

Walking out of VP on Saturday afternoon, I had five new Grindr messages. Booyah. Three messages were from an old “professional type” looking for a twinky college boy, and the others were from a steamy grad student in the School of Design.

by ANONYMOUS

Highbrow Does Tinder

This week, Highbrow decided to venture into the world of modern love and see what all the kids are talking about. Swipe right, bitches.

by 34TH STREET

Overheard at Penn: 02.27.2014

Theta frosh: Siri, where's Oz? A's boy: Who the fuck doesn't have Uber?! Girl on Locust: I may have egged a house once. VP security guard: I ooze flowers. Blonde girl: I just feel like I get really fucked up and suck dick at every date night.

by 34TH STREET

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