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Humor

Funny List Monday: 10 People Who Died For Your Sins

1) The Ghost of Christmas Present 2) Sammy Davis Junior 3) Walter White 4) Everyone who has very been to a Kmart 5) Black Jeus 6) White Jeus 7) Actual Jesus who probably looked Palestinian 8) Adam Sandler in exactly 14 years and 8 days 9) The girl who is always like "OMG LITERALLY DYING"  10) That random man you killed because of your unquenchable blood lust

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Underheards

Sceney Bitch: I’m done with this life of excess I lead.

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Lowbrow's Guide to Social Falling

Dress the part: Some people will tell you to always dress in black, but you want to peacock! How about a cape?

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Lowbrow Presents: The Groundup

Welcome back bitches. But this isn’t the dog park anymore. This week Highbrow got a little too drunk (also the oxycotin didn’t help). Now Lowbrow’s writing the (G)Round Up. Buckle the fuck down while we lay some gossip on you. #bark We know how you guys like puns, so dogs....umm, dogs.

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​Dispatch: The Martians are coming. Hide.

9:40 Just hanging with my girls, drinking Smirnoff ice. I don’t really want to go out tonight, but I know I will.

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Funny List Mondays: 10 Things you Meant to Do Today

Sometimes you wake up and you're just like "I'm about to get shit done."

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Lowbrow News: ​Samantha to Deliver Commencement Address

Samantha Jones, a public relations specialist and best friend of Carrie Bradshaw—but not quite the best friend of Carrie because, honestly, that’s totally Miranda—will be delivering the commencement address at the University of Pennsylvania’s 259th Commencement on May 18th.

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The Oregon Trail

Miss the iconic beeping of the Oregon Trail computer game? Head out on the 2015 Oregon trail game, so current that it'll make you feel like you're actually in Oregon.

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You Have to Eat This: 90s Yogurt

Oh, you're "really into chobani"? That's cool, now shut the fuck up while we talk about '90s yogurt.

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90's Characters: Where are They Now?

1. Arnold (Hey Arnold): had his first daughter young and now she's starting high school, the two don't get along.

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Overheards 02.19.15

Christian leaders at Starbucks under Commons: Coffee is like the Reformation.

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A Tale of 2 Tuxedos

There has always been two types of tuxes. Now we must decide who is the real winner: Formal Tux or Canadian Tuxedo.

by ROSA ESCANDON

Funny List Monday: Wedding Ideas

The most important day of your life

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Worst Wedding Photo Locales

There's no better place to document your impending nuptials than the hallowed halls of learning where you spent four years eating Wawa mac& cheese and blacking out.

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How to Lose a Goy in Ten Days

So you found out your nice Jewish guy with is actually just a Persian goy? We have your bubbe–approved exit strategy.

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Hot New Dating Apps

Swipe right, swipe right, swipe hard left.

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Overheards 02.12.2015

SDT JAP: I like to think my room smells like Chanel.

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What is wrong with you?

A handy flow chart brought to you by our proud sponsors at WebMD

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Overheards 02.05.2015

Theos frosh 1: "Can we get those girls from the Model UN thing to come to our party? Theos frosh 2: “Bro, I NEED it.” 

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Clinicals: Lowbrow Investigates

So you have a friend/ roommate/ crazy ex-lover whose a nurse and she is ALWAYS talking about clinicals.

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PennConnects

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