Vin Diesel has the mental capacity of a Lego Block. That becomes clear as Diesel, once an up-and-coming action hero, reprises one of his most Neanderthal-like roles.
The Potterphobic won't go to see the film. The Potterphilic will be compelled by overwhelming hype. On the sidelines, probably dragged by their Potterphilic friends, will be those who balk at the idea of seeing the movie before reading the books.
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban will not disappoint the two latter groups.
MoveOn.org, a democratic, internet-based advocacy group, billed The Day After Tomorrow as "The Movie the White House Doesn't Want You To See." For once, the White House demonstrates some good taste.
Already, Troy is the best film of the summer. The hyped movie fails to disappoint and is reminiscent of Gladiator. While those who know Homer's story of Greece's siege of Troy will find no surprises in this movie, they will certainly be delighted by it.
If a film could ever ooze indie cred, it would probably be Jim Jarmusch's Coffee and Cigarettes. The film, comprised of a series of vignettes, was shot over the past two decades, and at times plays like a short story collection on film.
Kill Bill Vol. 2 is such a hairpin turn away from the amusing but disappointing first chapter of Quentin Tarantino's epic that unsuspecting moviegoers can almost be forgiven for the knee-jerk negative response it is sure to elicit.
The Whole Ten Yards
Starring Bruce Willis, Matthew PerryDirected by Howard DeutchRated PG-13
Every time I try to say something substantive about The Whole Ten Yards, the only thing that can come out of my mouth are variations on "it was a pile of crap." Director Howard Deutch gives us a barrage of ethnic jokes, repeated slapping and Matthew Perry waving his arms around and falling down, and leaves it up to the marketing department to make the movie seem funny.
San Antonio, TX. The Alamo story has graced film reels more than a dozen times. It's Davy Crockett, Jim Bowie and Colonel Travis: add a few more ingredients, stir and repeat.
And yet another trainwreck for Kevin Spacey. In the tradition of perfectly respectable actors taking a step or 10 in the wrong direction, our man Kev follows K-Pax, Pay it Forward and The Life of David Gale with further punishment for unsuspecting moviegoers in the heartbreakingly vapid The United States of Leland. Spacey knows it's a bust and can't even show his face; on the movie poster, the man labeled as Kevin Spacey is not in fact Kevin Spacey, but the lesser known actor Martin Donovan -- who spends the entire movie making a big stink just because someone up and knifed his autistic son.
We're all relatively acquainted with the slew of coming-of-age teen comedies wherein implausibly attractive high school students overcome the bounds of social status, find love and provide a fortune cookie-sized moral to the tune of "Teenage Wasteland." The recipe works, though it usually makes for movies so saccharine that diabetics crumple to the floor of America's movie theaters.
There are things out there that go bump in the night," quips Professor Bruttenholm (John Hurt). "We are the ones who bump back." No, this isn't your average weekend-drunken-sorority-girl- hook-up; it's Guillermo del Toro's above average comic-to-movie film Hellboy. Mix two parts X-Men, two parts Men In Black technology and a sprinkle of The Hulk's big buff looks, and you have the recipe that not only looks good but doesn't leave a bad taste in your mouth.
Based on Mike Mignola's comic book series, Hellboy opens in 1944 as the Nazis, led by Grigori Rasputin, attempt to open a portal to another dimension.