Humor

Senior with Goldman Sachs Offer and "Problem Solving Skills" Gets Really, Really Lost in the Quad

"Which one is Fitler?" said the fully grown adult

by DANO MAJOR

Overheards 9.20.17

Archetypal Penn dude: "We're dating. With an asterisk." 

by 34TH STREET MAGAZINE

My Strange Addiction: Constantly Applying To Jobs On Handshake

You can't beat the rush.

by SHOSHANA STERNSTEIN

Green Day Woken Up, Goes Back to Sleep Until 2020

Green Day band members face a confusing past when they are woken up at the end of September.

by CAMI POTTER

The Streets of Penn: Personified

Ugh, why won't Locust just shut up?

by LILY ZIRLIN

Totally Impossible Penn Riddles

Is it social climbing if you step on an elevated surface?

by

Trump Supporters Confused to Find that Made In America Not a Trump Rally

According to many confused festival-goers, Benjamin Franklin was a heathen and who even is Migos anyway? 

by CAMI POTTER

Overheards 9.13.17

Kylie Penn–er: "He kisses so aggressively that I think he's going to pop my lip injections."

by 34TH STREET MAGAINE

Overheards 9.6.17

Elmo BBQ attendees about tourist who found his way into the party: "LET HIM STAY. LET HIM STAY."

by 34TH STREET MAGAINE

Google Maps Directions to Navigate All Four Years of College

Continue straight towards freshman NSO for 71 new friend requests and one regretful DFMO.

by SHOSHANA STERNSTEIN

Wharton Creates “Upper-Level” Seminar Dedicated to Gaining 500 LinkedIn Connections

Do I know you? Who cares!

by CAMI POTTER

Overheards 08.30.17

Washed up frat star: God is dead, and frats have killed him.

by 34TH STREET MAGAZINE

Study Finds NSO Is Only Thing Penn Students Are On Time For

We have exactly SIX minutes to get to backlot, guys.

by ANDREA BEGLEITER

All Your NSO Questions, Answered

Will there be ice breakers? One of the main goals of NSO is to get to know your peers.

by SHOSHANA STERNSTEIN

Boy MERTs Himself After Swallowing Too Many Hey Day Hats

I feel like you should know you don’t eat them.

by CLAIRE SCHMIDT

PennConnects


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