SDT girl: Wait, guys, how do you spell sorority? Because when I text it, my phone says “porn pity.”
Frat guy: Dude, tonight I’m gonna play spin the bottle in my head and wing man for you in whatever direction it lands.
Girl walking in the rain: Ugh, walking and holding an umbrella at the same time is such a struggfest.
Tabard chick 1: What are you doing tonight?
Tabard chick 2: Who are you doing tonight?
More from Highbrow:
True Life: I Hate My Roommate
Word on the Street: My European F.O.M.O.
Toasts & Roasts
Bearded Man on Beige: She should've known that a guy who has his name tattooed on his dick is bad news.
Chick in a TriDelt hat: Maybe the rumors are true and I do have rabies!
Friend: You’re not foaming at the mouth.